Friday, March 20, 2009
Frustrations and the pain they cause.
It's been a difficult week for me at the day J.O.B. Small issues have become big issues and they are all landing at my feet. Actually let me explain this better. Looking back on this week I've approached my work with a "just enough" attitude. By covering off on my individual projects and seeing things up to the point where I didn't feel that my physical presence was needed. Wrong...wrong (c) Charlie Murphy I am a person who operates from a place of being authentic. For me that means doing what I said I would do. Doing what others expect me to do because of my word. And exceeding those expectations by doing what I know has to be done. This week, I had a breakdown in that way of being. When I get these type of breakdowns it shows in my face and body language. I have a very hard time hiding these emotions. I take my work very seriously and take it personally when I feel exposed by not being completely authentic. This only became more complicated when three days in a row I got the same results. After some honest talks with some trusted co-workers I was able to let it go. I also asked for some advice from my guy Datwon who assured me that "bad weeks are just bumps in the road...but them sh*ts still hurt."(edit for my parents who read this stuff)I have allowed myself to get caught up in the illusion that this stuff is what matters. That this means something. Actually, as I type this I realize the lunacy of these thoughts. None of this is permanent and it's only as important as I make it. I choose to make my work ethic very important and I choose to invent the role of being the greatest manager in my agency. Not for anything other than making it a game and playing full out. I feel lighter for writing this out. Thank you for taking the time to read this. A few weeks ago I had a co-worker and now he's gone from this earth. Yeah...here's to what's important. Peace Dashaun